It's midnight. I lay in bed, staring at the polaroids across my bed. There it was, a photo of me and my team during senior year in High School, as we led 100 students for our schools' cup.

Next to that photo wall, there is this piece of paper, "Live Love Lead", that I penned in University as a student leader, having overseen 300 students. I flashback to how bold and confident I was , leading crowds with a carefree spirit and a bold passion.

Two years have passed, God calls me to lead teams in the business world and in advocacy. He brings me to places with bigger conference rooms, higher platforms, and bigger bets.

Fear started to seep in. So did insecurities. “I don’t have the right degree nor experience to lead this team”, “It’s too big of a dream to change the policy and impact thousands”, I would overthink.

The older I get, reasons made me rely on my own strength, rather than on God’s. Perhaps, the higher stakes and the weightier responsibilities had slowly dimmed my child-like trust that God is sufficient to take care of my “bigger” problems.

Matthew 26 recalls the story of Jesus at the Gethsemane Garden. Hours before He had to suffer the cross, Jesus pleaded with the Father and expressed his fears, “Father, take this cup from Me” (v.42).

Jesus wanted out. You see, fear is common for the leaders. It is what we choose to do in spite of our fears, that determines the fulfillment of God’s purpose and call in our lives. Jesus continued, “But not My will but Your will be done."

The truth is, the devil will not just wade when we're in the high way of doing God's work. He will try hard to stop us from stepping into our divine destinies with limiting beliefs and unforeseen hardships. Jesus has modeled for us the example of pressing on to obedience to the Father’s will regardless all else.
Jesus kept going for the joy that was set before him (Heb 12:2). So we press on to faith.

Fear fades in the presence of faith.

Faith enables us to see the unseen. Faith enables us to trust in His promise. The higher we go, the greater the dependence and the greater the discipline will have to be. Every believer has been equipped with the mind of Christ and His Spirit in us to enable us to lead as He leads.

In the end, leadership is not about pointing people to us but to God’s goodness. The platforms and promotion come from God; It was never through our competencies that brings us into places of influence. How freeing then, that in our fears, all God calls us is to be obedient and attentive as He leads us into the good future He has for us (Jer 29:11). So we press on to dependence.

And lastly, as a Father disciplines a child to step into the plan He has for the child, God calls us to embrace holiness and righteousness. To be holy as He is holy. and Just and He is just. Engaging in His commands and refraining from worldliness will keep us in His divine call. So, we press on to discipline.

Run this race, friends, until we cross the finish line to hear the sweet voice of the Good Shepherd, saying, "Well done my good and faithful servant."

There is grace in the race if we run in His power and pace. Scared we are, God is with us through the way.

X,

Tam