Professionally, I was at a career-high. Yet, emotionally & spiritually at an all-time low.

On the outside, everything seems to be doing well; yet I was miserably empty inside.

It wasn’t that I was idle either. Though I was doing a lot of things that look spiritually good, I felt spiritually dead. I was accomplishing what others deemed praiseworthy, but I had grown indifferent. I lost the sense of awe and wonder I once had.

The drug of success, led me to always searching for the next high.

I thought.. “I just need that accomplishment. If I hit that goal then I will finally feel satisfied.”

I was looking for that relationship., thinking it will fulfill what’s lacking.

Inside there was this dryness. The more I fill my cistern with what I thought would fill me, the emptier I felt.

“But my people have exchanged their glorious God for worthless idols..My people have committed two sins: they have forsaken the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water.” - Jeremiah 2:11,13

This cistern is my heart that has wandered off—that had forsaken God, the living water.

I tried to satisfy my hunger and thirst with what’s temporary—entertainment or relationship. These are good things. The problem is that I had focused more on the gifts rather than the Giver. I had missed the mark on what God commanded in 1 John 2:15,

“Do not love the world or anything in that world. For everything in the world-the lust of the flesh the lust of our eyes (envy, greed), and the pride of life (empty boasting) comes not from the Father but from the world. And the world and its desires pass away but whoever does the will of God lives forever.”

The emptiness came from this worldly mind—one that focuses on the self. One that is self-righteous; self-indulgent yet discontent; and more concerned In honoring the self than honoring God.

This persisted for few weeks, until God touched my spirit to nudge me. He said, “You have been given liberty. What have you been using your liberty for?” To which I reflected, this freedom God has given me, instead of serving one another in love (Gal 5:14) I’ve been using it to self-indulge in the desire of the flesh.

Ecclesiastes said, when you are grasping the things of the world, you are like chasing the wind. As believers, it makes us ineffective and it gets us nowhere. This freedom given by the Spirit, comes with the responsibility to use it wisely. I had to reflect on what this newfound freedom we have in faith must be used for.

1. We are given freedom, to pray a different prayer to serve.

To pray not, “God, make me rich and bless my business Lord so that people may know me”, but “God, you’ve entrusted the livelihood of these people to my care, if it pleases you may you give me the wisdom to run your business.”

2. We are given freedom, to come boldly before the throne of God.

The Spirit of God in us is greater than that of the world. When the world feels overwhelmingly big and scary, as children of God we have access to the throne. So come, commune with God. Hear him speak and seek His presence as your truest source of comfort that no men nor entertainment can satisfy fully.

3. We are given freedom, to serve not self-indulge

It is in the laying down of our lives that we find our purpose in this world. That is, to love God and love others. That it may be that in becoming living sacrifices, we find much likeliness to our Maker. That we may be as He created us to be—in His image.

Christians get dehydrated. Maybe you are dehydrated— irritable, easily fatigued, weak, confused, and thirsty. Whereas, living by the spirit calls for a different way of being.

• Instead of feeling thirsty, we grow content and are enveloped with a sense of peace.

• instead of feeling fatigued, we are filled with rest, life, and hope.

• We aren’t confused anymore but are filled with the mind of Christ and faith beyond what we can see.

• We do not feel weak but are filled with His joy and strength.

Jesus said, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” (John 4:14)

We have a world that clings to what is temporary, seeking its glory and wisdom, and what it doing is depleting ourselves from what is truly life. If you are thirsty, don’t run away from God. Run to God. He is waiting for you to come to sit at His feet to talk to Him.

“But He gives more grace. God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. Therefore submit to God, resist the devil and he will flee from you; draw near to God and he will draw near to you”. - James 4: 6-8

The Holy Spirit calls us to walk in the Spirit. It is here He will fulfill our truest longing and deepest need. Draw near to Him and He will draw near you. For in Him, is fullness of life. Don’t be trapped by the glitters of the world—one that will leave a soul empty and always grasping for more.

x,

Tam